“For many years, I have been moved by the blue at the far edge of what can be seen, that color of horizons, of remote mountain ranges, of anything far away. The color of that distance is the color of an emotion, the color of solitude and of desire, the color of there seen from here, the color of where you are not. And the color of where you can never go. For the blue is not away at the horizon, but in the atmospheric distance between you and the mountain.”
~ Rebecca Solnit
Dear —- [The name on this letter was smudged and illegible]
Blue is the most important colour in nature.
I realised this, driving at 5am, wishing I was anywhere else. It was the first time I had noticed the blue of the horizon, and I was transfixed by it. The mountains seem to perfectly encapsulate my melancholy drive. The more I looked, the more I saw blue everywhere, not just the horizon: the nearer mountains, the sky, the pylons, the road, everything was made from some shade of blue, and if you looked hard enough you could see it. I felt there was some kind of cosmic secret hidden in that, but I have never been able to quite figure it out. Perhaps it is something you know, but can never comprehend.
In the daylight everything here is blue. But there is no meaning in all of this to be found. There is no use in searching. Everything must be put towards surviving. But still I find myself turning towards the mountains and asking them why. If anyone knows what has happened to the world it is them. But of course they remain silent.
I hope you are well, or at least I hope you are still alive and as safe as you can be. To go from flying from city to city, meeting to meeting, to living hand to mouth under these cold mountains… I would say it feels like a dream but it hurts too much for that. Yesterday you were no more than a few hours away. Now I do not know if I will ever see you again. And that thought is to big to fully comprehend.
I am resting now and experiencing an odd moment of calm, the first since my plane crashed and this nightmare became my reality. I think I have run out of fear for the moment, that I’ve become so scared I’ve transcended beyond it. It’s the only explanation for why I can sit here, looking out at the view and writing you this letter.
I once heard that the blue of the horizon is a metaphor for all the things we chase in our lives. I never understood the meaning of this. Does this mean we always find a new goal every time we succeed? You reach one horizon, satisfied, then spy another? Or does it mean that we can never truly reach what we want, because it does not exist? I have no goal, no meaning to my existence anymore. I put one foot in front of the other because what else is there to do. Lie down and freeze to death? Let wolves pull apart my corpse? My only aim is to live, to survive, and one day, maybe, find my way back to you. Wherever that may be.
All my love,
[Bottom of the page is ripped off]
Hey, hope yous enjoyed this. I thought I would try something a bit different and wrote a letter from the perspective of inside the game. I guess a little bit of role play? As mentioned in the title, the game the screenshot is from is The Long Dark. For context, TLD is a survival game set in a post-apocalyptic world. The player character is stranded alone in Canada following the crash of their plane. Feedback is welcome, let me know if it’s something you liked, or even didn’t like! Thanks.